Midwest Specifics

...que?

Midwestern Spanish at its finest.

PS Whale of a Wash is my 2nd favorite sign in Fargo

Minne-Break Holiday-Apolis

A Photographic Day Trip to Minneapolis

Part One

Mall of America

Minnehaha Falls

Braving the Climate

Photograph of Interest

Mall of America's very own Butterfly Boy

Midwest Points

Referring to Minneapolis & St. Paul as "The Cities"= 2 MIDWEST POINTS

Taking the lightrail = 1 MIDWEST POINT

Surviving/Thriving in a Midwest downpour= 3 MIDWEST POINTS

Taking shelter with the locals at a gay bar = 4 MINNEAPOLIS POINT

Midwest Specifics

Fargo's first blanket of snow. 

Jaeda, Nancy & I 

Denny's: Love or Obsession?

L-O-V-E

Preston and I love Denny's. Our strong ardor for Grand Slams and endless coffee is the glue that bonds us together. Additionally, our mutual and respect for one another may also be a key component. But anyways, back to Denny's. 

Denny's is perfection. It offers breakfast ALL DAY LONG. It is constantly dreaming up new ways to meet their customers' ever-changing pallet, potachos anyone? It is always there for you, no hour is too late or day too sacred. And it's EVERYWHERE.

POTACHOS!!!!
Source: www.buttermilkpress.com

Absence Abroad

No matter your destination endless pancakes and "Moons Over My Hammy" will meet you there. Everywhere that is, but Australia*. We should have know that this very fact was a clear omen that the land down under could never be our permanent home. A pancake puppy-shaped void existed in hearts last year.  Slices of Ozzie fruit cake and pounds of Thai bananas were unable to fill such an abyss. During layovers and long bus rides Preston and I would dream up fantasy feasts. And before we went to sleep each night we'd pray for a safe return to "America's Favorite Diner".

*But, Tokyo does! We passed a glorious yellow sign during our four hour layover in Japan. Unfortunately it wasn't our stop; fortunately we were just twelve hours from 'Muurrrica. 

Devoid of Denny's=Devastation in Laos

Remarkable Times at a Remarkable Place

Our summer return ushered in a new era of Denny's passion. A mid-morning celebration for our three year anniversary opened this new chapter. But this isn't the first time that Denny's has been a backdrop for my grandest moments.

Best Moments at Denny's:

• The annual breakfast spot before childhood trips to Disneyland
• My victory dinner after I was elected middle school Vice President 
• During said victory dinner my mom surprised my sister and I with tickets to Disney World
• A whole wheat pancake frenzy at the beginning of my sophomore year of college 
• Celebrating New Year Eve's in style with an orange themed three course meal
• A snowy double date during my first visit to Washington
• Concocting my Honors Senior Thesis with old friends over endless cups of coffee
• The day that Reno taught me that Denny's serves beer

Denny's Date

Midwest Best Moment

                                    Experiencing the Middle Earth Second Breakfast Menu

Best of the Best!!!

Twins!

Check Out the Smaug Burger

Life Mantra

Radagast's Red Velvet Pancakes Puppies

The Hobbit Hole Breakfast & a peak of Honey Cake French Toast

Denny's Second Breakfast Menu has changed my life. I now realize that is so much hope and goodness in the world. And I encourage/command everyone everywhere to go and bask in its breakfast glory. CARPE DIEM. YOLO.

And from a less biased source:
According to my mom, a Tolkien disciple, the only thing missing was ale. Luckily I know this Denny's in Reno... 

Midwest Specifics

These photos mark the time I feared we were going to drown after a Midwestern thunderstorm. A fear which I dealt with by shrieking,"We're GOING TO DROWN. WE'RE GOING TO DROWN" whilst rolling down my window to snap a reel of pictures, because I am a dedicated blogging journalist.

PS Be sure to check out that big beautiful prairie sky. 

Monumentist Moments!!!

Legend-wait for it-..........DARY!*

Today was a day for breaking records and diving deeper into this funny northern world. TWO never-before-seen-or-felt moments wriggled there way into my morning literary.

Primero Monumentist Moment: 

Today marks the coldest I have ever ever ever been in my entire earthly existence. You know you're in for a morning of Arctic proportions when you aren't sure if your radio station is telling you the time or the temperature. Additionally, even my iPhone sought to warn me that it was "very cold". 

Dressed in my snow jacket of many colors I de-iced my windshield in 11 degree air. On the way to my morning appointment the heat of my eyeballs fogged over my glasses. After a brisk three minute drive I arrived at a blood donation center. Before the customary finger prick I stuck my iceberg hands into the warm folds of my armpits. I did this in the waiting room. And I didn't do it under my jacket. My elbows pointed out like a sunflower leaves as I reached both hands through the collar of my shirt. 

Unfortunately my attempt to defrost my digits failed. Two medical technicians were needed to pinch and prod the frozen blood out of my ring finger. Normally their rigorous squeezing would have caused tears to well up in my eyes. But my freezer-burned epidermis enabled me to chat and laugh without a second thought to what was happening to my nerve-less finger tips. 

Eight minutes later, they collected the needed 1/16 of a teaspoon. With the sample tested and my weight taken only my temperature remained. Both technicians knitted their brows after my reading. It turns out that I was too cold to donate. Even after ten minutes in the warm-as-June heated building my internal temperature was only a chilly 95.3 degrees.  Later in the morning, I saw a man wearing a short sleeve polo and a pair of dad jeans. Perhaps I really wasn't meant for this kind of living. I feel akin to the lone Flamingo that lives at  the Moscow zoo. 

Segunda Monumentist Moment:

Yoga outside of India is always translated. Classes vary, instructors vary, terms vary.  However my East-Meets-Midwest practice today takes it to a whole new Post-Modern level. High above the Island Park's balding treeline my yoga class expectations were shattered by the Fargo YMCA. For better or for worse. 

Within a second of walking into the studio I noticed something different. Gone was the lulling buzz of didgeridoos and the splish-splashing of bubbling brooks that I had come to expect. And in its place was soundtrack worthy of a Nora Ephron movie. We did downward dog to Norah Jones and balanced on one foot as Beyonce scaled "At Last's" octaves. Every song was mellow and positive. Overall the lyrics focused on world perspective and love, in a Top 40 kind of way. 

It may come as no surprise that our instructor was the first of her kind. She did not fit the long and limber, tattooed and vegan yogi archetype. She was short and sturdy; cornfed, with thick wheat-blonde hair that could only belong to a farmer's daughter. Her voice was equal parts scratchy, monotone and mall girl. She never once mentioned her style of practice or the c.d. playing in the background. She was unapologetic for who she was. In a way that we all should aim to be. And while the class was certainly different, it wasn't bad or irreverent. Well, actually, maybe playing Jack Johnson is sacrilegious in for some ascetics. But I feel as though her aim was noble. And her mix included one my favorite songs, Adele's cover of "Make You Feel My Love".  And I think that earns some Midwest Points.

Hearing A Favorite Song on East-Meets-Midwest Yoga Mix=1 MIDWEST POINT

Having Your Blood Freeze= -7 MIDWEST POINTS

*Believe it or not Barney Stinson, but North Dakota's state motto is....LEGENDARY!

Midwest Specifics

Midwestern Target Spoils. 

My best friend and I once dreamed up a plan to coach the Minnesota Vikings. Our Alma Matre's colors are also purple and gold, so we had enough festive wear to last a season. The team roster and Brett Favre's headshot were proudly taped to the our swamp-door. And between our dressers hung a photo of the two of us, with "Head Coaches" sprawled across the frame. 

Aspiring to become a Vikings Coach= 7 MIDWEST POINTS

It's Beginning To Look A Lot Like...

Early Arrival

A funny thing happened in Fargo this week. An early frost of Christmas decorations dusted every doorway and light post with tinsel and holly. When I asked a local about the preemptive festivity, she sighed, "It's too early if you ask me, but it's what they do every year."

Busy Sides, City Sidewalks, Dressed in Holiday Style

Christmas Here & There

While I personally observe a post-Thanksgiving holiday doctrine, I am completely un-offended by the gesture. I've seen much worse. Without the seasonal rhythm of Labor Day, Halloween and Thanksgiving to slow them down, Ozzie stores gush with red and green as early as October 1st. The back to school pencil cases are traded for candy cane colored Whoville contraptions. A summertime Christmas calls for all sorts of different Santa interpretations*. And while those of the mighty Midwest winters may dismiss Californian Christmas as flip-flop weather, there is still a wintery sense amongst the natives.

*think wake boarding Santas and neon Christmas trees

Joining in the Christmas Spirit

Not one to be a stick in the mud, I decided to embrace my new found yuletide surroundings with a bit of shopping.  Typically I prefer to shop for books and picture frames; clothes are not jive. But this new season, named fall, is leading me to dressing rooms and clearance racks. The time of sweaters has been thrust upon me. 

Dressed for the Mall*
*my mom refuses to go to the mall underdressed

Maxxinista

In addition to comfy sweaters, it is also time that I pick up some new jeans. It has come to my attention that a lot happened in the world of denim while I wandered around Thailand last spring. My well worn Levis are no longer cool. I am in need of a serious dose of hip. But not too much. A recent trip to Forever 21 taught me that I may never be the epitome of hip again. It looks like I am destined to be Currently 23, and Eventually 24, and so on. Lucky for me, there is TJ Maxx, which giveth unto me a woven bounty. And with said bounty a monster has been unleashed, e.g. I bought jeggings!?!! Not to mention I have already made plans to go boot searching next week.

Glories of Glories!!!

I cannot wait to surprise all my regulars tomorrow. It turns out my fashion choices have sent out a ripple at my lovely cafe. Typically, I dress for each day as if it were 70 outside, seeing as how I only have clothing for such temperatures. And before I head out the door, I zipper up my bulky and fluffy snow jacket. Once I get to work I shed my wintery layer and double wrap my apron strings. My bare arms never crossed my mind, until the one day I wore a flannel button down (Californians wear those). Over six tables of people and the mail man were shocked at my plaid covered arms. Hopefully my new threads will help me blend in better. And then people will finally cease querying if I have ever seen snow. Come on people, southern California is not Siam.

Midwest Specifics

A disputed* snow cloud loomed just beyond downtown. 

* The mailman claimed it was, every other man said it wasn't.

I sided with the mailman, trusting that they know things about rain, sleet & snow, dontcha know. 

Our little place in the Midwest FEATURE

My True Idenity

I have a confession. I am not like all the others, I have blue blood. You see, I am a duchess of organization. I am a countess of warm lighting and the Holy Roman Empress of hanging photos. From doll house to dorm room my love of decor has been with me all along. And now that Preston and I have a place all our own my design kingdom* has grown.

*most of the subjects have immigrated from the Fargo/Moorhead's surrounding thrift stores

TV Land

If we had a TV, and cable for that matter, we wouldn't need a remote. Preston's addiction to repurposed wood and deep adoration of Mike Holmes would ensure that the screen would permanently display whatever Canadian reruns graced a little network known as HGTV. Before I met Preston I didn't even know there was a channel that documented people flipping houses and negotiating closing costs. The only televised abodes I previously watched where those showcased on MTV's "Cribs". Wandering down hallways with Backstreet Boys or taking a bath with Mariah Carey was my ideal combination of interior design and Hollywood ritz.

Little Apartment on the Praire

As my own "Cribs" homage I have created a virtual tour of our very own Fargo crib.

Welcome.

The Entry

La Cocina

Tiki Idol & Magnet Fun

Table Land

The Loooouuuunnge 

 Our Musical Arena

(a glimpse at how it pieces together)

The Hallway

The Study/Gallery

Our Fine Art Collection & Repurposed Ladder Shelf

Idahome

 Ahhhrt

An Iranian Portrait on Canvas

Our Oceanwater Bedroom

The Illustrious Dumpster Dresser

A Kimono & Such

&

The Finest of All Shower Curtains

Thanks for coming over MTV but now it's time for you to go. BYE.